Back At It

Scribbled by Darrell Barnes

Haven't been here in a while.  I figured I'd start this post off with a song from This Will Destroy You, called "Mighty Rio Grande." Play it as you read on, if you'd like.

About a month or 2 ago, I began collecting some books.  I've never considered myself a reader, because I can only read about a half a chapter before I want to either sleep or turn on the television.  However, I bought the book, "Forgotten God," as seen in some previous posts and tore through this book.  I felt so much effort from the author to explain to the world his view on the Holy Spirit.  The one thing that I can pinpoint as a crucial point to the Holy Spirit is that He is a comforter, not a condemner.  Well, I suppose that just like any other time in my life, I tend to lose track of things that I've learned before.  However, I was reminded this morning about the goodness in the Holy Spirit, and I'd like to share with you what I read.

I'll start with what I call the Post-Forgotten God, heh...weird.  This is the time after the book wore off and I went back to staying busy and soon forgot some of the truths that I had learned from the experience.  I get so caught up in sin that I tend to believe that there is this voice in my head that is always condemning me and beating me down.  I've never dealt with Schizophrenia before, but I have been thinking of an idea for a while now called "Spiritual Schizophrenia."  I can't seem to think clearly, and when I think about things there are several voices in my head telling me which way to go.  It's exhausting.  I woke up this morning and came downstairs to turn the t.v. on and for some reason it's broken.  Suck.  However, I looked down and there was a copy of The Village Pub on the table from 2007.  For those of you that have no idea what I'm talking about, it was a small magazine that The Village used to put out some years back.  It's pretty interesting.  Anyways, on the cover of this copy were written the words, "Spiritual Schizophrenia."  Weird.  Had I seen this before and just somehow adopted the idea for my own?  Who knows, all I know is that I was intrigued.

The writer, Charissa Brimage, started off with a conversation between two people that I am very familiar with.  One person telling the other that he/she knows she's in the wrong and that they need to get it together, all while the 2nd person is convicting him/her of being horrible.  Sounds like something I've been through before. Well, big surprise, the two people are the same person.  So many thoughts and emotions fill our minds and we believe that they are coming from some spirit.  Here's the kicker, we believe that this is the Holy Spirit beating us down verbally, and making us feel worthless.

We've believed that the destructive guilt trip was the Holy Spirit convicting us
 She goes on to say,
The truth is that the Holy Spirit is a Comforter, Counselor, Helper, Advocate, Intercessor, Strengthener, and Standby(John 16:7)
I stand here today to say that I've been here, and that I spend too much effort in believing that I am worthless and am convinced that it's coming from the Holy Spirit telling me this.  So to encourage any of you who may be feeling the same way sometimes, please read about the love of God the Father, who sent the Son, who after ascending into heaven, sent us the Holy Spirit.  And the Holy Spirit is fully God, and lives with the same love for His children that He had when he gave his only son to die for our sins that we might be free from this bondage and condemnation.

Spend some time this week exploring God's love.  Never stop learning that we have a Father in heaven that loves us unconditionally.

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